Hello all. This post is a request for good vibes. Today I took my first progesterone-only birth control pill. With luck, the day I take my 84th pill we will be cleared to try to conceive our rainbow baby.
Before we get to Day 84 the progesterone is supposed to calm down my weird uterine lining and either eliminate the polyps completely or clear the way for my RE to take them out in a simple office procedure.
By Day 84 I will also have taken a repeat blood test for APS. My doctor is betting--well, hoping--that it comes back negative. If it does, that would uncomplicate my life nicely.
And by Day 84 I am hoping to have a second opinion from a very reputable source on the whole septum/bicornuate and what-to-do-about-it thing. The more my RE stares at my charts, the more she thinks my uterine shape isn't a problem - that it's a little weird but a "normal variant" and not requiring surgery. I would love it if she were right. And I would love it if this big shot she is contacting would actually get back to her.
I did confirm that I have two kidneys, so that is one less thing to worry about. On the other hand they did spot polyps on my gallbladder, which is one more thing to worry about. No reason they shoulda been looking at my gallbladder, but now I have to go see another specialist who will tell me there is a 0.5% chance of cancer and offer to take my gallbladder out if I want. No thanks. I'll get that out of the way by Day 84 too.
So much of what comes next is utterly out of my hands. I hate that. There are some things I can control, like for the next 84 days I can faithfully take my prenatal vitamins and drink my herbal tea and go to acupuncture. Beyond that I can only hope and pray that the pills do their job and that all the other things I've been worried about turn out not to be worries at all. Will you please hope and pray with me?
What will happen on Day 85? For one thing, I will turn 38. My birthday wish will be that all the medical appointments, lab tests, ultrasounds, and drugs just melt away for a while. That I'll be left in relatively good health and with some amount of trust that my body knows how to have a healthy pregnancy. That my husband and I can find some pockets of peace to make a baby out of love, not stress. *blows candles out*
8 comments:
I'm wishing with you, Jenni.
xo
Jenni, hoping day 85 is a magical day for many, many reasons. Much love to you on this journey, maybe it be swift and easy. xo
Fingers and toes crossed for you!
Jess xx
PS I owe you an email and I will write back I promise, just maniacally busy right now.
best wishes from me, too.
xx Ines
Positive energy and good wishes from here
2 kidneys-score!
Hoping and praying with you...
wishing with you and praying for you.
You are in my prayers every single day sweetie...even when I am unaware that the day may be signifcant for you; you can know I am praying.
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